Groupon wants to name your baby.









I don’t know about you, but I’m getting a little tired of crazy, valueless marketing gimmicks and this one takes the prize.

Celebrities are famous for naming their babies crazy names and they can get away with it because after all they are celebrities. But a coming from a company, this has to be one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever seen. Groupon wants to name your baby. Not only do they want to name your baby, they claim they are the “World’s Foremost Authority in Baby Naming.” They even trademarked it. “Groupon has been naming things since 2008, when it named itself by combining the words “grout” and “superweapon.” Its previous baby-related ventures include Grouspawn and its sponsorship of the all-infant rugby league, Tot Scrum.”

And want do you get in exchange for allowing them to name your baby? $1,000. Every new parent could use $1,000 in their pockets to offset the $261,512 Baby Center predicts it will cost to raise a child.

But would you saddle your child with the name “Clembough” for the rest of his or her life? Please say no.

So far five people have signed up for this.

“My daughter is named Clembough and will one day be president of this continent. Thanks, Groupon!” Deborah Rodbelt, mother of Clembough Rodbelt

“I had Groupon name my son because I wanted him to be proud of his future tombstone.” Donald Clunch, father of Clembough Clunch

Here’s my offer. I’ve been naming things for a lot longer than Groupon and I’m willing to help you name your baby for free.

One Response to “Groupon wants to name your baby.”

  1. Wow, that’s just…bizarre. I don’t associate Groupon with being an expert in naming a human being. I don’t think coming up with the name of its own company and working with some groups associated with parenting qualifies Groupon as an expert in baby naming.

    Bicultural Mama

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